Some Query Help

Anybody out there querying? With tons of crazies people busy Nano-ing and agents and publishing houses getting ready for the holiday-season-slow-down, it could be a good time. Maybe. I don't know - just do it when you're ready. ;)

ANYWAY - I (erica) won a contest and got an agent critique on my query letter. I didn't ask permission to post it and can't think of anything else to blog about just got it today, but there are some general pointers I'd like to share.

First - this is my completed ms that I've queried and revised and now sent out a few more queries on. I have lots of different versions and have had fair success on partial requests along with a couple of fulls. You know the whole "query widely" idea that gets lots of talented authors their agents? Yeah, I believe that in theory. In reality, I can do about 3 rejections at a time. Hey, I'm a busy girl. :)

SO - here's what I sent (it wasn't my very latest version, but close). I'll redline some of the (paraphrased) advice I got. Hopefully she doesn't mind if I share her name - the agent who did my critique was Molly Jaffa from Folio Literary and while the following are some of her ideas, the words (even the redlines) are mine. Do with them what you will:

The last thing Kenz Grayson wants to do is switch high schools right before her senior year. Especially if it means going back to the town where she buried her family secrets (along with her father) seven years before. Unfortunately, that's exactly what her mom's making her do. Why oh why is she making her do it? Be more specific, erica! With little hope for the year ahead, she goes, and watches another chapter of her life close behind her. yeah, duh, we already know that. cut this sentence.

Things change when Kenz meets Lincoln James. Even after she's warned that he's a total serial dater, she finds him irresistible. Why? Pretty much every YA romance has an irresistible guy in it. How is mine different? It doesn't take long before they're not only dating, but almost inseparable. Except that's when Kenz starts noticing just how many things are blocking her way to becoming happy again. Then again, with a car accident that almost kills her mom, a sexual abuse allegation against Lincoln, and the truth behind a super-secret surgery in his past--she has a lot to worry about. She didn't like my list. Some of this should maybe go in the beginning as the hook.

Kenz is well known for choosing flight over fight. This isn't evident in the rest of the query, so why bring it up now? I need to explain it better at the beginning before throwing this is there. This time, she's determined to take a stand, even if it's against herself. While I love this line, I'm getting that other people don't know what it means. Be more specific.

A NEW DAY is a YA contemporary romance, complete at 64,000 words. It will appeal to readers who also enjoy books such as The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen and The Book of Luke by Jenny O'Connell. Okay, so this shows where my book would be shelved, but it was pointed out that these books are a few years old and I should bring up some newer ones in my comps. *sigh* *I love these books*

Note: She said that my query could go a long way with some agents simply because it was well-researched. So remember, just like in elementary school - neatness counts. Use paragraphs, vary your sentence lengths, use comparable titles, and personalize it to the agent your sending to. Good luck everyone! And don't get sick from all the candy!!

Where I've Been Lately

Since I probably haven't been around to your blog for a while, and believe me I really, really do miss you, I have been around a little bit, but only while researching agents, query writing, and scrolling down the twitter feed.

I know I've said it (too many times) before.  I'm a busy mom of (almost) three.  I'm beyond smothered by papers to grade and behaviors at work this year.  And my house is hideous.  How am I different from you?  I'm not.  So how you manage to keep up with all of that and not have eliminated blog hopping is beyond me.  (SERIOUSLY!  How do you do it all?!?!?!)

You're a SUPERSTAR. 
You AMAZE me.

Seriously.

I'm sorry I've been ignoring you and that one of my compromises to being a mom, teacher and a writer has been to stop blog hopping.  It wasn't intentional.  It just sort of happened.  I'll stop feeding you empty promises that I'll fix it any time soon.  Know that I WANT to blog hop again.  I just haven't figured out HOW to or WHEN to yet.  I know you all have amazing things to tell me.  About getting agents and publishing a book and writing a new WIP and taking a new grad class and about all the great writing things you've learned and about your kids and how cute they are or about links you've found that have been uber helpful and wise and about great books you've read and I'm sure many, many other things that I SHOULD know all about.

I'm also at least 14k behind on my 50k in 50 days goal.  Yes, I've even lost count.  It's that bad.

BUT THE POINT TO THIS POST.  ahem.

Here are some of the sites I've added to my favorites lately:

--The reason (I saved them)?  I wanted to bookmark them to go back to later.  Because heaven forbid I take the time to actually read the whole article/post through at the time I found it.--

And here they are:

YATOPIA IS HOSTING A DARK YA BLOGFEST THROUGHOUT NOVEMBER (WEDNESDAY POSTS)!  DON'T MISS OUT!

If you get stuck in the middle of your WIP, check this out!

WHAT THE DONALD MAAS LIT AGENCY IS LOOKING FOR

Getting out of the Slush Pile (Picture books)

ENTANGLED PUBLISHING'S WISH LIST (FOR SUBMISSIONS)

New Social Network for Writers, Editors and Agents

ELANA JOHNSON'S WRITING THE QUERY LETTER

(I actually have several(+) more, but I'll save those for another day, another post.)

I hope you found some/all of them useful because then at least if I'm not polite enough to follow you back to your blog today at least I can be helpful.  (I miss you.  I hope you are doing well.  If you tweet at me, I might see it.  Or link to your blog post in my comments and then I'll click on it and say hi.  Really.  Really.  I am naughty and take time out to watch one TV show:  CASTLE and he's, I mean it's, on TONIGHT, so I can visit you while I watch.  I will, too.  You just wait and see if I don't!)

and also, in honor of HALLOWEEN (which is today) i totally wanted to watch THIS movie this year.  i promised myself this year i wouldn't forget, that i'd make the time, but alas, here it is HALLOWEEN  and i've forgotten again.

 i don't do horror.  but i do do CLUE.

~christy  (because erica is a better neighbor.  she sees some of you out and about sometimes)

Need a break?

Here, have a video. Who said vampires/werewolves/zombies were a new trend?? ;)



Temporarily out of service....

since it's my (christy's) day to post and i'm feeling a little bit under the weather (mentally speaking), you get this (for an excuse):

  Well, that's not exactly true.

oh, how i WISH this was true

                                                                                                 yeah, this one is just about right....

 
(Or, well, the blog will be back up and running when it's erica's turn again on thursday.)

As erica stated in yesterday's post:  We  have parent/teacher conferences this week (and for the next two weeks), so we're busy grading and entering grades and prepearing conference folders.  And while I was going over and over my evening schedules (change in routine=forgetfullness) and dr. appointments (regularly scheduled ones and a three hour glucose test since i failed my one hour one (boo!)), I realized how very, very close I'm getting to having a third child!  And that I need to get my sub plans for 6-8 weeks ready and get all of my online grading organized for January report cards!  Yikes!  Suddenly two months from now seems very, very close!

So, as I was saying:
 

oh, and while i was searching for these images...this one just happened to be on the same page (for be right back?).  i don't understand it, but also don't mind it.

 i thought maybe you wouldn't either. :0)



(yeah, you're welcome!)

The Truth About Teachers

(note: this blog post is all erica's fault. it does not represent the thoughts of any other teacher, including christy and sometimes including erica. okay, carry on.)



It's time for parent-teacher conferences. You know, those meetings where you go into a classroom and sit in child-sized chairs and stare at a teacher you don't know very well, but who you are a little afraid might know your kid better than you do - and OMG did she just say my kid was disrespectful/talkative/etcetcetc.?? NOOOO!!!!!!

Okay, that might just be me. As a parent. Now let me share with you a little bit about sitting in that teacher chair.

I've been recording your child's (um, not YOUR child's, but you know, a collective "your child's") progress every day since the first day of school. Yes, if your kid cried when they got dropped off (reminder: I teach preschool), it was written down. And then typed in. And reflected on.

With each and every skill. Oh, so many notes...

And still, while we sit there in that child-sized chair that we sit in every single day, but this time faced with a parent, we wonder if it was enough. Were all the nights staying at school until supper time, all the weekends spent entering grades/progress, all times we made sure to record two positives for every negative note enough to sit down and talk to these parents? Will this be the one who complains to administration that school is too hard? Or too easy? Or that teachers are too overworked? Or too underworked? Is this the parent who distrusted school their whole lives and I just now have the ability to convince them it's a good thing? Or is this the one who has such wonderful memories of their school experience, I can't possibly live up to them?

So, that's it. It's parent-teacher conference week. Which is probably different for me than for the upper grades. I teach 3-year-olds from low-income and disadvantaged families. I'm sitting across from parents who love and adore their preschoolers like none other. I hope I can do them justice. (but first, I have about 12 hours of note entering to finish today, which is why I'm writing this on Sunday morning. note-writing happens at school. note-typing happens at home.)

What do you have going on this week? Any parent-teacher conference stories to share (from either side of the table)?

Okay, fine, never mind all that. Here's a very scary story my 5-year-old told today:

There was a dark, dark house. And inside it was a dark, dark room with a dark, dark doorknob. If you turn it, you find a dark, dark closet. Inside the closet is a dark, dark box. Inside that is a ...

PUMPKIN!!!!

I mean, really, who can compete with that sense of plot and suspense??